Well, this morning came, and we got the kids up, took Will to work, got breakfast, etc. I REALLY was not looking forward to going. I would much rather stay in my pj's in our homey apartment, facebooking, and watching the news. After dropping Will off at work, it is about a 25 minute drive back to where we live. So, I had a whole 25-30 minutes to ponder whether or not I was REALLY going to muster up enough courage to go to this meeting for moms. Finally, I came to the conclusion that I would drive by the church and would then make a decision about going. Yes, I was making something huge about something so simple. I drove by the church, and there were several cars there. I felt my whole being just cringe and shut down. So, I kept driving past the church. However, I kept feeling a "nudge" from God as if He were saying, "Turn around, and GO!" I wasn't happy about it, but I turned around, parked, got the kids plus diaper bags and my bag, and we walked into church with a "smile" on my face. I got both kids to their rooms, and I was alone. I didn't have Will, and I didn't have the kids. Nobody to hide behind, and nobody to use as my crutch. I was on my own to discover what God had for me today. A kind lady directed me down the hall where I heard laughter, women talking, and music. I walk slowly down the hall, giving a quick smile to those I passed, acting like I was a confident mother excited to be the new person in a room full of 80+ moms. As I got to the room, I see lots of moms talking together, mingling, and laughing. I felt as though everyone stopped and watched me walk to my seat. (so not true) Today's topic was: "Dressing for you body type and loving what God gave you." We had a fun fashion show and had lots of laughs. After the fashion show, a lady gave a quick devotional/word of encouragement. She used my favorite Psalm. Psalm 139. She read the verses where it talks about how we are fearfully and wonderfully made and how God knew us even before we were born. Then she went on to read the verse about how God cares about each one of us and we are in His thoughts constantly. She went on to say how special we are to God, and if we were fearfully and wonderfully made in His image, then what is there not to like about ourselves?
I think all women struggle with their appearance at some point. I know I do. A lot of times I like to hide behind my pj's or my sweatshirt because I am ashamed of what I look like. But, in God's eyes, I am His masterpiece. I am His Princess. See, in God's eyes, I am fit for His royal ball. A quote that was read today was: "The curve of a smile is a woman's most perfect curve and the only tag that matters is the one that says Robed in the Righteousness of Christ." Wow! Why are we so concerned with our looks and our appearance when we already have the approval of the One who's opinion matters the most? Who cares if you have a big nose, or are a few pounds heavier than you'd like to be, or if you have a toe longer than the other, or saggy boobs, or jiggly arm fat, or thighs that rub when you walk? None of that matters, because the One who formed us in our mother's womb has already stamped us with His approval and given us a gown for His royal ball. Women and girls, it is time to embrace our bodies and love ourselves for who God made us to be. Love those extra rolls, love those spider veins, love those saggy boobs, and remember that you are BEAUTIFUL in the eyes of our Beholder. j
If that wasn't enough, God still had more for me to learn this morning. As I was sitting there, soaking this all in, God reminded me of the prayer that I have been praying for about 2 or 3 months. The prayer where I ask God day in and day out what MY role is. Yes, I know I am a wife and a mother. But, Will has this awesome role as a hospital chaplain and he gets to minister to families in need at a well known hospital, and he gets to dress up each day. Lord, what is MY role??? And it was during our ending prayer of mom's time out when God finally answered this prayer. As I was sitting in my chair soaking it all in of what I had learned about what God thinks of me, it was like I heard His still, small voice talking to just me, as if I was the only one in the room. It was as if He whispered in my ear, "Heather, your role is to be a wife and a mother. That is what I want your role to be right now. Be a wife to Will and a mother to the 2 children I have given to you. Give your all in those roles." I could feel the relief and weight lifted off my shoulders. All this time, I felt as if I was letting my husband down and letting my God down. Surely, I can be doing something big and great. But, all this time, all God wanted me to be was a wife and a mother. I can minister to my husband and I can minister to my kids. So, for now, I am going to enjoy being in that role of a wife to an amazing husband and a mom to the 2 best kids in the world. I am going to give my all, and pray that I can make a difference in the lives of my husband and my kids. And you know what the best part about this role as a wife and mother is??? I can do it while wearing pj's. :)